Surplus Pork
by Geoduck
Summary: The students from Yezo Agricultural High School examine the new piglets-and discover nine when there are only supposed to be eight. Where did this little piggy come from?


Yugo Hachiken was pretty sure that most investors' meetings were different from the Yezo Agricultural High School Pork Eaters Society's meetings. For one thing, it took place in a pig shed rather than in an office. Most of the participants were dressed in coveralls and boots rather than white shirts and ties. And most of all, most investors' meetings were not held in order to examine piglets.

"Alright, everyone, let's look at the…" The piglets interrupted Hachiken by sticking their heads out of the crate that was their home.

A familiar tightness filled Hachiken's chest as he looked at the piglets. 'Why do they have to be so adorable _and _tasty? If it were just one, they'd be so much easier to deal with!'

"...six, seven, eight. That's all of them." Tamako, always all business, was looking them over. "They appear to be in good health. When were they most recently examined by a vet?"

"There's something else in there," Mikage pointed at the crate. "I can hear another animal."

"Is it some kind of vermin?" Tamako stepped back. "We might need to catch it to make certain it wasn't carrying disease."

Mikage climbed into the pigpen. "Could I get a flashlight, Fuji-sensei? I'll just have a quick look."

The teacher pulled a flashlight from clips on the wall and handed it to her student. "I need you to be careful, Mikage. If there really is a feral animal there, there's a chance it could bite."

"I'm not worried. Wild animals rarely run towards bright lights, and anyway, my work gloves are very thick." She knelt down and pointed the flashlight into the darkness of the crate. "Where are you… there! Oh, but it isn't vermin. It's another piglet."

"Eeh? Nine piglets?" Hachiken turned to Tamako. "Is that right? Was there some kind of mistake?"

"The manifest from the breeder states eight piglets only. This is a major mistake. This could result in litigation."

"Oh, and also this one appears to be a different breed. It's black while all the others are pink. Maybe it's a Berkshire? Come here, boy, I won't hurt you. Come on out." Mikage reached into the crate and pulled out a tiny shivering animal. "Aww, the poor thing is terrified."

"Sensei, is that really a Berkshire pig? It looks a little different from the pictures I've seen." asked Aikawa.

The teacher picked up the piglet from Mikage's hand and held it up to her eye level. "This is a pot-bellied pig. Popular as a house pet, not typically raised for food due to their smaller size. The return on investment just isn't good enough."

"But how did a pet pig get mixed up with our pigs?" Tamako returned to the subject at hand. "We don't raise pet animals at this school."

"That's a mystery to be dealt with later. For now, we need to concentrate on the other eight. What's the next item on the agenda?"

Yoshino held up her hand. "Castration, right?"

At that, the black piglet shot out of Fuji's hands and careened around the pig shed like a black pinball.

There were sounds of pandemonium in the room as the students tried to corral the terrified animal.

With all the commotion, nobody noticed the door opening. "Excuse the intrusion, but have you seen…" The visitor looked up. "Fuji-chan? Is that you?"

The teacher looked over. "Unryu-san?"

"It is! Fuji-chan!" The visitor cocked her head slightly. "Haven't you graduated yet?"

Fuji doubled over from shock then straightened out again. "I'm a _teacher _here, Akari."

Akari smiled. "Haha, I was only joking, Fuji-chan. Oh, you're not teaching a class right night, are you? I'd hate to interrupt."

"I _am _teaching, but…." There was a crash as a knot of students attempted (and failed) to corner the piglet. "...you're not really interrupting. What are you doing here, anyway? Visiting out of the blue like this."

"Well, I've been traveling around, for a little while. Scouting for new talent. And since I was close by, I thought I'd visit the old school. Oh, by the way, I've misplaced a small black piglet. You haven't seen one, have you?"

As if on cue, the piglet jumped into Akari's arms.

"Oh, there he is, never mind."

Seeing the class agog at the formerly panicked piglet suddenly pacified, Fuji spoke to her students. "Class, this is Unryu-san. She was my senpai back years ago when we were both students here. She manages a pig ranch in the Tohoku region."

"Actually I prefer the term 'stable' to 'ranch'" Akari muttered.

Tamako was unimpressed. "Ma'am, didn't you see the signs at the campus entrance? Pets are not allowed on campus."

"Oh, Ryoga-kun isn't a pet."

"A service animal then?"

"Oh, of course not." Akari held the piglet up to her face and kissed him on the snout. "Ryoga-kun is my adorable husband!"

The students were repulsed at this statement. 'Is that what happens if you stay single in this business too long? This year, I need to concentrate on getting a lover-I can't let _this _happen to _me!_"

* * *

Notes: I love the manga and anime Silver Spoon. Sadly, the amount of fic for this fandom is low indeed. So I wrote this to contribute to the cause.

For those who aren't familiar with Ranma 1/2, one of the premises of the series is that there are characters who are cursed to change into other forms when they touch cold water. One of them being Ryoga Hibiki, who takes the form of a black piglet. Unfortunately, Ryoga also has a terrible sense of direction, so I think it would be quite likely for him to stumble upon a pigpen every once in awhile. Akari, his girlfriend in the series, breeds, raises and trains sumo pigs (hence her insistent terminology-stable, not ranch.)

So, why couldn't Akari have been a Yezo alumnus? Why not indeed.


End file.
